The voice exiting the mouth and heard by others. This is your recorded voice. You can hear your own air voice without recording it by placing the fingertips of your cupped hand around the outer edge of the ear, pointing your palm toward your mouth and holding it a finger's width off your cheek. See body voice.
This is the first voice we hear of ourselves. It is only heard by oneself or with special equipment. It sounds muffled when compared to our air voice because this sound travels through the bones and tissue between your vocal cords and the ear drum. It sounds similar to our voice under water, but with better clarity. See air voice.
The Four Windows, also called the Johari Window, are:
One - knowledge of self known by self and known by others.
Two - knowledge of self known by self and not known by others.
Three - knowledge of self unknown by self, but known by others; and
Four - knowledge of self unknown to self and unknown by others.
Getting feedback looking through the Four Windows is key to knowing your complete self.
To avoid bad sound messages be proactive in conversations. Choose to be silent, start some small talk, pay someone a compliment, or make a positive statement about them, and then listen to your “audience.”
If you ignore, dismiss, or hide from your sound message mistakes, you will not improve your sound message language skills.
Acknowledge your mistakes and increase your proactive conversations.
(Also tone-of-voice) The color of our speech. This voice variable is initially harder to describe than volume or speed. The only way to ‘measure it’ is by your own decision and the opinions of others. Perhaps linguists can measure this feature of our voice. Us lay-people cannot and it is not necessary or needed anyway. The opinions of those who hear the speech and speak the speech are in the best position to determine the tone of their words. If there is disagreement describing tone, choose different words to describe it until a comfortable opinion reveals itself.
When you have a list of words to describe tone, then it becomes as easy as describing volume and speed. Remember, when we name something, we tame it or at least make way for others to work with you on that something to accomplish a common goal.
To describe or ask about tone, use adjectives like boldly, angry, joyously, sadly, lamenting, sarcastic, pining, happy, fearful, trembling, ecstatic, and emphatically. Make your own list and add many of the other descriptors you can use for tone. When you wonder how someone is feeling, get that information from the source. Make a casual statement with your best guess of their tone. Something like “Those are very bold words. Is this something you feel strongly about?” Even if you are not sure at first, guess and ask anyway. Eventually, your accuracy will improve to the same level as the rest of us with your repeated efforts. Sometimes all we can do is guess, so give yourself an A for guessing and a D if you don’t ;-).
How loud or silent we speak. This ranges from silent to EXASPERATINGLY loud. Volume can be no quieter than silent and no louder than EXASPERATINGLY loud. While this feature of our voice can be measured, the opinions of those who hear the speech and speak the speech are in the best position to determine the volume of their words.
